Jaffe Morning Briefing: July 10, 2015



The content and opinions expressed herein are those of Jaffe Communications and do not necessarily reflect the views of NJTV.

VERNON – History was made this morning at Action Park, as the Today show’s Jenna Wolfe made the first public voyage on the world’s tallest and longest waterslide. Coming in at 1,975 feet, weighing seven tons and requiring 1,000 gallons of water an hour, it’s is an impressive project, worthy of the Guinness Book of World Records, on site to present a plaque. The water slide will be open to all slip and sliders next year.

ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL – Gov. Chris Christie is waking up this morning in some luxurious hotel far away from New Jersey and learning his greatest nightmare has come true: Donald Trump is now leading the gaggle of GOP Presidential hopefuls in the polls and our governor is nowhere on the screen. The latest national poll has Trump leading Jeb Bush by four points after spouting off some callous quotes about immigration. Republicans are quick to note that voters will soon be tired of the out-of-touch millionaire, especially when he starts waving his finger and telling everyone how he was the second choice to be Reagan’s Veep.

JACKSON – Thinking about becoming a professional zombie? Then put on your most tattered clothes, prepare your limp and continually moan as you travel down the New Jersey Turnpike today to Six Flags. At 6 p.m., the amusement park will be auditioning local zombies for its 24th annual “Fright Fest” that begins in September. Apparently, the job takes “Brraaiins!”

ON THE BENCH – The New Jersey federal courts have declared a “judicial emergency,” as four of the 17 federal judges have retired or moved to part-time status, the Record reports. The problem, of course, is politics, as the Republicans in Washington are holding up three judicial nominations offered by Democratic senators. The remaining 13 judges – handling hectic dockets in Camden, Trenton and Newark – are trying to keep their heads above the piles of paper, but how much attention can they really give to each case? Apparently, the judicial system is at the mercy of the U.S. Senate. So much for “checks and balances.”

FORT LEE – Get ready to see the world’s largest free-flying American flag at 10 a.m. today, when workers unfurl it from the George Washington Bridge to help mark our World Cup soccer champions – including four Jersey girls. The 450-pound flag will be on display until 2 p.m. today, as NYC hosts a ticker-tape parade.


MANCHESTER, N.H. – It’s “shock-and-awe” week for GOP presidential hopeful Jeb Bush. A day after releasing tax returns that show he earned a stunning $29 million between 2007 and 2013, Bush told the New Hampshire Union Leader that Americans “need to work longer hours” and be “more productive” to fix our economy. While Bush claimed the conservative newspaper’s editorial board took his shocking quote out-of-context, Democrats began painting Bush as man-of-the-people … really wealthy people. Of course, it didn’t help when news broke yesterday that he’d also hauled in a whopping $114 million in political donations since January.

SALEM, Ore. – An Oregon school district is on full backpedal, after sending a letter to parents announcing their little cherubs would be handed over to the state if they aren’t picked up on time. The Salem Statesman Journal reports the letter was sent to Swegle Elementary School parents “in error” because the school principal did not review it. An apology is forthcoming.

Meanwhile, we love this paragraph of the letter: “Children must be picked up on time. If they are not picked up on time, we will call the Oregon Department of Human Services and you will then have to pick them up at court the next day.” Wow. Wonder what kind of rules they have for the Back-to-School Bake Sale.

NEW YORK – In yet more devastating news for the traditional cabbie, Uber is launching a new service today – a $10 carpool in Manhattan. For just $10, an Uber car will take you anywhere you need to go below 96th Street. It is a great solution: People get cheap rides, and the city can show it is reducing traffic and air pollution by advocating more car pools. The only loser would be guys like Louie DePalma, running out of cabbies to yell at from his dispatcher cage.


BRADFORD, VT – A Monroe N.Y. motorist was just in a hurry … a really big hurry, but the Vermont State Police were less than understanding when they twice clocked the 30-year-old real estate developer doing over 90 mph on a five-mile stretch of Interstate 91. A trooper first ticketed him on I-91 near Bradford on Thursday for doing 97 mph in a 65-mph zone. Just five miles north and few minutes later, another trooper pulled over the 2015 Mercedes SUV for going over 90 mph. Besides getting another ticket, he was charged with negligent driving. Now, he will be racing back to Vermont in late August for a mandatory court appearance.


It is for some reason that the mobile game “Kim Kardashian: Hollywood” became one of the top three downloads in the free app category of the Apple App store, after being released just two weeks earlier. Interesting to see how many people would be willing to spend 99 cents for it.



Wabbit – Adjective

Definition: Exhausted, tired, worn out

Example: “He was wabbit from traveling the world’s longest water slide.”

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